Post by gellibee on Jun 18, 2006 0:07:31 GMT -5
Part of interview with Debbie Morris victim of kidnapping and rape by Robert Willie & Joseph Vaccaro. The character Patrick Sonnier in Sr Helen Prejean’s book ‘Dead Man Walking’ was based on Robert Willie.
www.pbs.org/wgbh/pages/frontline/angel/interviews/dmorris1.html
Morris: Let's see when I was 16 years old, I was with my boyfriend, we were on the riverfront in Madisonville, and these two strangers approached our car with guns and they kidnapped us at gun point, drove us to Alabama where they shot Mark and left him to die there. Brought me back to Louisiana. They drove me around for a long time. I was raped and after some time passed they let me go.
: When Robert Willie was executed.... how did you feel about that then?
Morris: I had a very numb feeling. After he was executed, I felt relieved. I felt like I didn't have to be as scared any more of him. But before, the couple of days before and the night before, just was a real numb feeling, I wasn't happy, a lot of people would ask me if I was happy that he was going to be executed and that's not ever a feeling I remember having.
Q: Tell me what your feelings were about Robert Willie being executed and, at that time, how you felt about the death penalty.
Morris: I think that although I had a lot of feelings, the main feeling I had was relief that he was never gonna be around to hurt me again. I was gonna be able to let go of some of the fear. It was -- however, very conflicting for me because it was hard knowing that a person was going to die, perhaps because of some things that I said in the trial or my role in it. I felt some sense of responsibility. I was definitely for the death penalty then. I wanted him to die.
But there as no happiness or no joy in that at all. I think just because of the responsibility that I felt. I didn't really feel like it was my fault, just that I had a role in it and it wasn't a good feeling knowing that I had anything to do with something that eventually would lead to somebody's death.
Q: And at that time, was there something you were hoping he was going to say to you? Was there something you wanted to say to him?
Morris: I don't think I would have had the courage to talk to him. But a part of me wanted to. I think I wanted to know or I needed to know, did he have any remorse for what he did? Was he sorry for what he did to me? Why me? Did he ever -- I wanted to ask him-- did he ever think about that during the time he was in prison? Did he ever rethink that and think maybe I shouldn't have done that, she was a nice person, how could I have done that to her?
Q: And what about you to him? I mean was there anything that you wanted to say to him or something that you had to resolve in yourself before he died?
Morris: I needed to be able to let go of the hate and the anger before he died. I needed to find a way to forgive him. Even if I hadn't resolved the things that happened to me or I can't say that, that I had recovered from the things that happened to me but I didn't want a person dying without me being able to find a way to forgive him.
Q: Did you?
Morris: I think I did to the greatest extent that I could. I don't know if I was able to fully forgive him. I wanted to and I tried but I knew that later on in my life I had a lot more problems dealing with the actual things that happened to me, the rape and kidnapping and all.
And when I dealt with those issues, a lot of anger came up -- but it was different. It wasn't as much like it was directed at him.
So I feel like I did forgive him to the greatest extent possible and I think since then, I've done a lot of healing which has brought me more to a fuller forgiveness.
www.pbs.org/wgbh/pages/frontline/angel/interviews/dmorris1.html
Morris: Let's see when I was 16 years old, I was with my boyfriend, we were on the riverfront in Madisonville, and these two strangers approached our car with guns and they kidnapped us at gun point, drove us to Alabama where they shot Mark and left him to die there. Brought me back to Louisiana. They drove me around for a long time. I was raped and after some time passed they let me go.
: When Robert Willie was executed.... how did you feel about that then?
Morris: I had a very numb feeling. After he was executed, I felt relieved. I felt like I didn't have to be as scared any more of him. But before, the couple of days before and the night before, just was a real numb feeling, I wasn't happy, a lot of people would ask me if I was happy that he was going to be executed and that's not ever a feeling I remember having.
Q: Tell me what your feelings were about Robert Willie being executed and, at that time, how you felt about the death penalty.
Morris: I think that although I had a lot of feelings, the main feeling I had was relief that he was never gonna be around to hurt me again. I was gonna be able to let go of some of the fear. It was -- however, very conflicting for me because it was hard knowing that a person was going to die, perhaps because of some things that I said in the trial or my role in it. I felt some sense of responsibility. I was definitely for the death penalty then. I wanted him to die.
But there as no happiness or no joy in that at all. I think just because of the responsibility that I felt. I didn't really feel like it was my fault, just that I had a role in it and it wasn't a good feeling knowing that I had anything to do with something that eventually would lead to somebody's death.
Q: And at that time, was there something you were hoping he was going to say to you? Was there something you wanted to say to him?
Morris: I don't think I would have had the courage to talk to him. But a part of me wanted to. I think I wanted to know or I needed to know, did he have any remorse for what he did? Was he sorry for what he did to me? Why me? Did he ever -- I wanted to ask him-- did he ever think about that during the time he was in prison? Did he ever rethink that and think maybe I shouldn't have done that, she was a nice person, how could I have done that to her?
Q: And what about you to him? I mean was there anything that you wanted to say to him or something that you had to resolve in yourself before he died?
Morris: I needed to be able to let go of the hate and the anger before he died. I needed to find a way to forgive him. Even if I hadn't resolved the things that happened to me or I can't say that, that I had recovered from the things that happened to me but I didn't want a person dying without me being able to find a way to forgive him.
Q: Did you?
Morris: I think I did to the greatest extent that I could. I don't know if I was able to fully forgive him. I wanted to and I tried but I knew that later on in my life I had a lot more problems dealing with the actual things that happened to me, the rape and kidnapping and all.
And when I dealt with those issues, a lot of anger came up -- but it was different. It wasn't as much like it was directed at him.
So I feel like I did forgive him to the greatest extent possible and I think since then, I've done a lot of healing which has brought me more to a fuller forgiveness.